Far away – 04.09.2006
Author: Jeneral // Category:
Mood: deprived of sleep and depressed
Just woke up, walked over and switched on the computer to watch in fancination at the wonderful photos someone sent. I'm glad he sent me a copy, it reminded me of something.
It always seem this way. I walk into a class and I see people hanging out in cliques, I online and I see people in cliques, I go to work and I see people in cliques. Hmm. I think maybe its time for me to be alone.
It is not like I’ve been the greatest sociable person in the world. I mean that even through my primary and secondary, I may not have been in the major clique, but at least I’ve been kept in the loop of information. At least some information…
I guess I shouldn’t bother, I mean since I have given this area of relationships to the lord, he should take care of me already. Somehow, it is harder to give up; I can never get over the face of rejection. Online, offline, real, virtual, it is all the same.
Looking at the recent photos my cell sent me, it reminded me of the wonderful feeling to be excluded from photos, and I mean I can always be forgotten. But most of all, nobody knows. I was not there anyway, so I shall not bother. But besides this case of me working and not being able to be at certain events, this always happens. Excluded, outcast, pariah, they are all the same. Oh, the photos were great, thanks Terrance!
Maybe I am making a mountain over this little molehill of rejection. Either way, I feel far away, and I do not feel like facing any human contact. Maybe I should stop going out altogether and stick at home, at least, I know, I won’t be there any… more…
Just woke up, walked over and switched on the computer to watch in fancination at the wonderful photos someone sent. I'm glad he sent me a copy, it reminded me of something.
It always seem this way. I walk into a class and I see people hanging out in cliques, I online and I see people in cliques, I go to work and I see people in cliques. Hmm. I think maybe its time for me to be alone.
It is not like I’ve been the greatest sociable person in the world. I mean that even through my primary and secondary, I may not have been in the major clique, but at least I’ve been kept in the loop of information. At least some information…
I guess I shouldn’t bother, I mean since I have given this area of relationships to the lord, he should take care of me already. Somehow, it is harder to give up; I can never get over the face of rejection. Online, offline, real, virtual, it is all the same.
Looking at the recent photos my cell sent me, it reminded me of the wonderful feeling to be excluded from photos, and I mean I can always be forgotten. But most of all, nobody knows. I was not there anyway, so I shall not bother. But besides this case of me working and not being able to be at certain events, this always happens. Excluded, outcast, pariah, they are all the same. Oh, the photos were great, thanks Terrance!
Maybe I am making a mountain over this little molehill of rejection. Either way, I feel far away, and I do not feel like facing any human contact. Maybe I should stop going out altogether and stick at home, at least, I know, I won’t be there any… more…
0 Responses to "Far away – 04.09.2006"
Post a Comment