Stopping the panic button – 09.09.06
Author: Jeneral // Category:
Now playing in head: Memory - CATS
I've hit the last straw and am being pushed too hard and I'm going to shut down. My body is sick, maybe with stress or over exhaustion and I absolutely have no time to settle down and rest. I can't feel God with me either.
Thankfully, the day after I wrote this post, I went for a retreat opposite TC. After watching what Jesus did on the cross for us, I shed a tear, for if I were to press that panic button, I was going to leave my Father behind, and I was going to miss his love for me. Nailing all my hurts onto the cross, I had to leave early after that session, this maybe a new way to cope with my stressed time. If I need to leave early, I will just leave otherwise I shall never have time.
If I were to press the emergency shutdown button, the one gives me the attitude and the strength to off my phone, not go out, not go IM, stop responding to mails and finally the one that my family keeps blaming that takes time away from home; church. This shutdown will have long and short term effects, the last one, which is most drastic, will eventually, lead to the breaking up with my princess as she can’t be with a non-Christian.
So I was glad that I was able to experience God's love for me first hand and refrain from leaving.
My interview yesterday was interesting; it was at 3 pm, Mac Donald in S poly. I was supposed to leave the house at 1.30 pm. My bro came home at 1 pm and demanded that I go out and buy him lunch when I have not finished with my questions, at 1.15 he spoilt the monitor of my desktop and asked me to fix it. I left the house at 2, got to S poly at 3 got lost and reached the Mac at 3.10. My interviewee was not present.
Apparently, SP students are quite well checked in Dover MRT station. I have never been stopped by a station official to check my laptop bag ever since I got my laptop; this was the first time at Dover MRT. I wonder do students in SP carry stuff that really needs to be checked by station security.
I rushed home to greet my mum who came back from KL, rushed off to meet Mai who made a great fried Bee Hoon and marinated chicken wings for the class W36M BBQ. We meet Benji at woodland and proceeded to somewhere behind woodland stadium to the BBQ pit. Mai who also did a great job cooking the chicken wings was the most hardworking person during the BBQ. The rest managed to cook some food, sit around, chat, eat the food and play badminton. Special thanks to all the organisers including Si Ying and Hui li, also special thanks to those who went to buy the stuff, got the fire going and went a second time to buy more stuff, and those who helped cook like chef Mai. What can I say, he is a natural.
Lord, speak to me! Lord, bless me expand my territory, give me influence over it, let me harvest some people for you, and let your hand be on me, keep me safe from harm and free from pain.
I've hit the last straw and am being pushed too hard and I'm going to shut down. My body is sick, maybe with stress or over exhaustion and I absolutely have no time to settle down and rest. I can't feel God with me either.
Thankfully, the day after I wrote this post, I went for a retreat opposite TC. After watching what Jesus did on the cross for us, I shed a tear, for if I were to press that panic button, I was going to leave my Father behind, and I was going to miss his love for me. Nailing all my hurts onto the cross, I had to leave early after that session, this maybe a new way to cope with my stressed time. If I need to leave early, I will just leave otherwise I shall never have time.
If I were to press the emergency shutdown button, the one gives me the attitude and the strength to off my phone, not go out, not go IM, stop responding to mails and finally the one that my family keeps blaming that takes time away from home; church. This shutdown will have long and short term effects, the last one, which is most drastic, will eventually, lead to the breaking up with my princess as she can’t be with a non-Christian.
So I was glad that I was able to experience God's love for me first hand and refrain from leaving.
My interview yesterday was interesting; it was at 3 pm, Mac Donald in S poly. I was supposed to leave the house at 1.30 pm. My bro came home at 1 pm and demanded that I go out and buy him lunch when I have not finished with my questions, at 1.15 he spoilt the monitor of my desktop and asked me to fix it. I left the house at 2, got to S poly at 3 got lost and reached the Mac at 3.10. My interviewee was not present.
Apparently, SP students are quite well checked in Dover MRT station. I have never been stopped by a station official to check my laptop bag ever since I got my laptop; this was the first time at Dover MRT. I wonder do students in SP carry stuff that really needs to be checked by station security.
I rushed home to greet my mum who came back from KL, rushed off to meet Mai who made a great fried Bee Hoon and marinated chicken wings for the class W36M BBQ. We meet Benji at woodland and proceeded to somewhere behind woodland stadium to the BBQ pit. Mai who also did a great job cooking the chicken wings was the most hardworking person during the BBQ. The rest managed to cook some food, sit around, chat, eat the food and play badminton. Special thanks to all the organisers including Si Ying and Hui li, also special thanks to those who went to buy the stuff, got the fire going and went a second time to buy more stuff, and those who helped cook like chef Mai. What can I say, he is a natural.
Lord, speak to me! Lord, bless me expand my territory, give me influence over it, let me harvest some people for you, and let your hand be on me, keep me safe from harm and free from pain.
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